Keegan (3 still)

That next afternoon I was sitting in the living room waiting for Unique to swing by and get me. Mo’Feir had left for work early that morning. After a long conversation basically about nothing, we had both went to sleep in our separate bedrooms. I was afraid of actually giving in to this. Something was definitely feeling funny to me about it. I guess being friends all that time sort of made it seem sort of out of the ordinary. I had looked around the living room at a few pictures of Carthez and Ca’Reighn, and I didn’t even know that they had graduated. I hadn’t even heard either of them talk about college, but then again, I didn’t talk with them that often.
“You about to run out with Unique?” I heard Ca’Reighn ask behind me. She had a way of sneaking up on me.
“Yeah,” I said. “I didn’t know that you had graduated.”
“Yeah, I thought you knew,” she said smiling. “You should really wear your hair down, it fits you better.”
“It’s too much of a hassle,” I said pulling at my ponytail thinking there was nothing wrong with it.
“You’ll find out one way or another how to deal with it. Want me to curl it?” she asked as I made my way back to the couch.
“Like how?”“I can do straw curls if you want, or loose corkscrew curls…” she said bothering with her own hair.
“Maybe later,” I said. “I don’t think we would have enough time right now.”
“Cool,” she said walking out of the living room. After a while I heard a knock on the front door and went to answer it. A young woman that had to be about 22 at the most was standing out there, and it looked like the truck she was riding in, a black Chevy Suburban, looked like it had a few people in it already. I opened the door.
“Hey,” I said looking at her and then looking out at the truck.
“Keegan?” she asked with a smile. “I’m Unique.”She stood about 5’3 compared to my 5’6 frame. She had a dark skin tone, basically even with mine, and she had shoulder length hair.
“Hey,” I said reaching out my hand. She came in and gave me a hug.
“Girl, I don’t do that, you’re family now,” she said. “You ready to go?”
“Yeah,” I said, and with that we headed on out to her truck. There was a guy on the front seat that was light skinned with long hair. On the back there was a dark skinned brother with waves, he looked sort of tall, and then there was another guy in the furthest back seat who was sort of light skinned, looked a little tan though, with a wild hair style, like he had just taken down braids and let his hair stay that way, but it was cute on him. He had an eyebrow piercing as well. He was on a phone and the darkie was looking at me smiling.
“What? This is Mo’s girl, huh?” he said with a smile, looking up at the light brother in the driver’s seat.
“I guess so, Fo,” he said looking back at me. “Hey, love, I’m Felix, Unique’s husband. That black man beside you, that’s Corley, but we all call him Fo’ Nigga. That fella in the back, that’s Joe’Nathan.”
“Hey,” I said nervously as Unique got settled in the truck, and as I got settled.
“Hey, what’s your name,” Maurice asked me.
“Keegan,” I said, hearing Joe’Nathan say something in the back. I turned to look at him.
“You say something?” I said.
“No ma’am,” he said smiling. “Straightforward are we?”“Very,” I said. I was feeling a little comfortable by the time we were out of the neighborhood and hitting the highway. Every time I turn around I see someone cute I thought, looking at Fo' Nigga across from me and trying not to turn and look at Joe’Nathan. Something about him that caught my eye. I couldn’t think of what it was though.

Mo'Feir (ch. 3 continued)

I had no clue what to say to her. No clue, but I had to say something, hell, I wanted to talk to her about everything…but I couldn’t. What to say? I thought, wishing I had never asked her to talk with me in the first place.
“Well, I talked to Unique today. She was thinking about coming over tomorrow and then riding out with you,” I said. Give me a break, I couldn’t think of anything else.
“Oh, for real. That’s cool,” she said sitting up and getting out of the bed. She moved constantly, and I always wondered why. I watched her as she sat down on the floor leaning against the wall. Mmh, sexy, I thought.
“What?” she asked, looking at me confused. I must have said that aloud without being aware.
“Nothin, talking to myself, really.”
“Ummm, alrighty then. I know there is something you want to talk to me about so stop running all around it and get to it,” she said. Demanding. Reconsidering? was the thought that popped up, then I shook it away.
“Look, I know you are new to this, and I don’t want to hurt you at all, but there are some things that you don’t know about me, and…well, I don’t know if you will like them or not. I just….shit, I don’t know,” I said, giving up on explaining myself to her. It was just hard to find words when I was telling her what was on my mind.
“Talk to me, Mo,” she said looking straight at me. I sat up and sat on the edge of the bed.
“If we are best friends, how come we don’t know that much about each other?” I asked, looking at her silhouette in the dark.
“Worded that wrong, Mo. You know a lot about me, all I know is the basic stuff about you. You know enough about me to know my mother’s middle name, what time I was born, and what makes me mad enough to drive a car through someone’s house. I don’t know anything past your name, birthday, favorite color, favorite food-”“I get it, Keegan, I get it,” I said wishing I hadn’t asked that one.
“Why don’t you tell me about things that have gone on in your past? Why are you so secretive?” she sounded concerned, nearly agitated as well.
“Because there are some things that are better left alone, you know?” I said watching her. She motioned to pull her hair back, which was already back in a ponytail, realized what she had done, and put her hands down. Habit.
“No, I don’t know, Mo. That’s why I would want to know, and if I decide to continue to pursue a relationship with you, you have to talk to me. You have to trust me. I may not have ever been in a real relationship, but I know what is required-”
“Okay, I got you. I hear you,” I said cutting her off before she said something that I didn’t want to hear.
“You just cut me off. Don’t cut me off,” she said standing up, still leaning against the wall.
“Why not? I mean, I understand what you’re saying,” I said.
“Look,” she said. “I’m starting to get a bad vibe with this already. If you don’t want to tell me who you are…then don’t. I will tell you this much though, I am not going to be in any relationship where I don’t know anything about my man.”
She said it. Damn. She said what I didn’t want to hear. I stood up and stepped about five feet away from her.
“Some things you just have to give time, okay? I don’t have to just up and…and tell you everything about me. Some shit doesn’t even seem possible to say. I can’t even say some things to myself,” I said, getting a little loud only because she had done the same. “Don’t try to pressure me because I can’t seem to tell you everything.”
“I’m not pressuring you to do anything, it’s you who obviously wants to tell me something. If you don’t, then don’t tell me,” she said getting louder. “Wouldn’t bother me any. You should know what you’re going to talk about before you try to hold a conversation on the personal level.”
That hit me. I closed the space between us until I was less than six inches away from her.
“You know what, I don’t care. I don’t care. If you think I’m not trying, that’s you. If you don’t want to be with me, you are entitled to your own decision making. But I will tell you this…I want you. More than you know, I want you to be there for me, I want you to be able to feel me, I want to be able to talk to you,” I said, lowering my voice nearly to a whisper as I spoke. “Just bear with me. I haven’t been in a relationship in a while so just try to hang with me.”
“Anything else you want to say?” she asked. She sounded as if she didn’t even hear what I had just said.
“I want to make this work. We haven’t even started and we’re having problems. I want this to work out right for us,” I said. She didn’t say anything for a moment.
“Why wont you kiss me?” she asked.
“Because I,” I started before realizing what she said. “Why wont I kiss you?”
“I didn’t stutter, Mo.”
“You want me to kiss you or something?” I asked stepping a little closer to her. “I will if you want me to.”
I had her caught between me and the wall, and our faces were only an inch apart.
“Tell me,” I said, getting close enough to catch her breath for her if I wanted to, then placing my hands around her waist. I put on a smile that she could possibly feel, and watched her react to what I was doing. I didn’t kiss her because I didn’t think she was ready for that. Not that she had never kissed, I know she had, but she wasn’t ready for mine. My kisses led to other things if you get what I’m saying.
“I want you to…” she said in barely a whisper. I smiled, could have appeared a little mischievous, but there was another meaning behind that. I could feel that feeling, like I needed something and she had it. If I didn’t stop myself soon I would end up with a hard on and no way to get rid of it. She was already sexy and didn’t know it…
“You want me to what?” I whispered, my lips close to her ear. I awaited her reply with patience that was running out. She was taking forever to answer me, and I started to think she wouldn’t.
“Ki-” she started before I kissed her, cutting her off completely. She was warm, her lips were warm, her tongue was warm. Holding her was like holding a heartbeat…I couldn’t even explain it. I took a step back and she stepped with me, placing her hands on my chest and tugging at my shirt. I was tempted…so tempted, but I couldn’t take it there. Not yet. Any longer and I’d be in some trouble. I pulled away, and she stood there with her eyes closed. I stepped back a few steps and looked at her biting my lip, the taste of hers still lingering there.
“You like that?” I asked once she opened her eyes to look at me.

Keegan (Ch. 3 cont'd)

“Me too,” I said before I realized what I was saying. Mo’Feir was about to do something, and I had no idea what he was going to do. The one thing I could think about was how good he was looking and how great he smelled. I couldn’t even that keep myself focused.
“Oh, you are?” he asked, sounding more seductive, something I rarely heard. He closed the space between me and the wall, pressing himself up against me, and I could feel his heart beat. Finally, the serious face was replaced with a smile.
“Want to walk with me to my truck, baby?” he asked me, moving forward so his lips were just near my ear.
“Sure,” I said trying to that keep my composure. He took my hand and we headed up the hall, then on outside to his truck. The door was unlocked and he got in, sitting sideways so his legs were slightly out of the car.
“I have to go to work,” he said. “I wish I could stay and talk to you.”
Losing myself, oh shit, I’m losing it I thought as he ran his hand over my cheek. With his other hand he pulled me between his legs. He brought his face close to mine then pulled away, embracing me instead.
“I’ll see you later,” he said as he let me go. I nodded, pulling back my hair as he started his truck. Before he was out of the driveway I was back in the house.
“Mmmh,” I heard Carthez say from behind me. “He’s finally trying to show you how he feels?”
“What?” I said looking back at the twin, and I still couldn’t get over how much he looked like his older brother. “Can’t play that off, darling,” Carthez said smiling. “Good morning.”
“Good morning,” I said with a nervous smile. He was staring me down with this look in his eyes. I couldn’t put a finger on exactly what it was about that look, but it got to me, almost made me uneasy. “Where does Mo’Feir work?”
“He hasn’t told you?” Carthez asked me as he took some things out of the cabinet.
“Obviously not,” I said, helping myself to some cranberry juice from the refrigerator.
“Well, I wont tell you either,” Carthez said with a smirk on his face. I don’t know if it was a half smile or a smirk, but it looked like a smirk to me.
“Alright, fine,” I said leaning against the counter.
“There is a lot he has to tell you,” he said giving me that look again. “Oh, and Unique will be calling you.”
“Oh, okay,” I said placing my glass on the counter and walking back to the bedroom I was occupying at the time. I took out my luggage case, removed all of my clothes and laid them neatly on the bed. Out of all the thoughts, the one thought that kept running through my head was why hadn’t Mo’Feir kissed me. I reached between the fabric of the case and pulled out my envelope. That was the cost of living, right there. I placed it in one of my shoes laying beside the dresser and pulled out my other shoe box from under the bed.
“Hey, sis,” I heard someone say from behind me. I turned to see Ca’Reighn standing there in the door. She was putting a band around her hear, pulling her dreads back just a little.
“Whatsup? Girl, that is cute what you have on,” I said looking at her gear. She was wearing a black tee with red and green lettering that said ‘REAL BLACK GIRL’, and a pair of faded denim jeans, with black and green lining.
“Thanks,” she said smiling. “You up for breakfast?” She was putting in some earrings now.
“Yeah, sure,” I said.
“Good, because Carthez is cooking it up for us,” she said with a laugh. “Hope you like a five course breakfast.”
“Sounds good enough for me,” I said. She came in the room and sat down on the bed.
“You’re thinking about moving in with Unique?” she asked looking at the shoe box.
“Yeah,” I said pulling my hair back into a bun and pinning it. “Is that a good thing?”
“More than good. She’s the best person to live with. I stayed with her for a while earlier this summer.”
“That’s cool, I was afraid,” I said laughing.
“Word? Yeah, Felix, he husband, he is real cool. Taught me a little bit about being black, and he’s light skinned,” she said laughing. “ Then he has all of his friends. They are like family once you get to know them.”
“For real?”
“Definitely,” Ca’Reighn said looking at my hair. “You ever thought about cutting your hair?”
“Sometimes,” I said honestly. “I don’t know what I would do with it if I did though.”
“Oh there is a lot you can do to it. Trust me. If you ever want to cut it or want something to do to it, let me know,” she said. “I did my own.”
“You did?” I was shocked. He hair looked like it was done by a professional.
“Yeah, something I learned from my mom,” she said running her fingers through her locks.
“What happened to her?” I asked her, hoping she wouldn’t brush me off.
“Crazy shit,” Ca’Reighn said looking off into space. That was the first time I had heard something come out of her mouth that was anger filled. “But that’s in the past now.”
She stood up and walked over to the door. “I’ll see you at the breakfast table.”“Alright,” I said as she walked out, thinking to myself I guess I wont find out any time soon. I hit the shower then went downstairs for breakfast.
*****
It was a little after three in the afternoon and the phone rang. Carthez answered and did a little small talk, then handed me the phone.
“It’s Unique,” he said turning and walking off.
“Hello,” I said feeling close to nervous.
“Hey, what sup?” came a friendly voice from the other end. “Is this Keegan?”
“Yeah,” I said feeling a little more comfortable with her tone. She sounded young, almost like a teenager.
“Alright, cool. I hear you’re going to college out in Atlanta,” she said.
“Yeah, I am,” I said not knowing what to say.
“Well, what college are you planning on going to?” she asked. I heard a few other people walk in the room on her end.
“Oh, I’m going to Georgia State,” I said.
“Cool, Joe’Nathan goes there,” she said. “Where you from?”
“Decatur.”“Oh, well that’s not too far,” she said. “Mo still stayin in Cobb county, I see.”“Yeah,” I said. “You in school?”
“Girl, yes. Senior at Clark right now,” she said sounding even more friendly. I could the smile in her voice.
“Congratulations on that,” I said laying back on the couch.
“Well, the reason I was calling was to see exactly where you were going. I know you’re more than likely going to be okay in my book because you’re Mo’Feir’s friend. But, even though I hate to cut this conversation short, I have to go pick up some people and wake my baby up,” Unique said sounding kind of rushed.
“Alright, it was great talking to you,” I said thinking that it was a quick conversation.
“Yes, same here. Hope to see you soon,” Unique said before she hung up the phone. I put the phone on the table next to the couch and got up to go back to my room. I counted my money for the third time that day, then tried to figure out a way to put it away until I really needed it. I stored everything differently every time I finished with it, and this time I had it all tucked in the back of the closet. I heard my cell phone ringing and went to answer it.
“Yes, hello,” I answered cheerily.
“KEEGAN WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?” I heard my mother yelling through the phone.
“Somewhere away from that hellhole you call a home,” I said, my tone becoming more serious.
“You get back here, and you get back here now. You don’t want me to come and find you!” Mother was raging on the other end and I didn’t give a flying fuck if she was.
“I’m a grown ass woman, and on top of that I’m safe. I don’t have to stay in that house with you any longer than I need to, and my choice was to leave so I’m leaving. Getting an education and making my own life instead of you trying to make it for me,” I said, trying to that keep my composure.
“You know what? Since you want to play the hard way, I am going to make you wish that you had never left here, you hear?” my mother said barely over a whisper. I knew that she was either drunk or high, and I could feel my eyes welling up with tears.
“Momma, I wish that you weren’t like this, and I’m pretty sure things could be different but they aren’t. I tried to help you out, but you have to help yourself. I don’t want to hear you say anything like that ever to me again. I wouldn’t cut you off, but this conversation is over,” I said, and with that I hung up the phone. Tears were streaming down my face and there was no way for me to stop them. As if on cue, Mo’Feir was walking into his bedroom and turned around. I turned to face the bed so that he wouldn’t see me, but it was too late.
“Keegan,” I head him coming up behind me. “Keegan, what’s wrong?”“I don’t want to talk about it,” I said wiping my face, trying to stop the tears. He turned me around to face him. The look he had on his face was focused, yet had a look of sympathy within. He brought his hands up to my face to wipe the last of my endless tears and whispered five words.
“Let me make it better.” With that he pulled me in for a hug, and I held onto that moment, wishing it would last forever. As he sat down on the bed, he pulled me down next to him and held me in his arms. In his arms I felt protected, and I felt at peace. Before I knew it I was sleeping. I dreamed of my childhood days with my father. Back before my mother had turned into what she had become.
*****
I woke up at about ten that night, and Mo was not in the room with me. I got out of the bed and walked across the hall to see him sleeping in his bed. What looked like paperwork was laid out on the table next to his bed, but I didn’t bother it. I climbed into the bed with him and moved as close as possible to him. He was facing me and he opened his eyes, then smiled.
“You alright?” he asked in that low voice of his. I nodded with a smile.
“Good,” he said to that and turned me around, then pulled me closer to him so he could hold me. I could tell he was sleeping seconds after that.
*****
I woke up at three in the morning and forgot where I was. I sat up and looked around, then it dawned on me that I was still in Mo’Feir’s bedroom. I looked beside me to see Mo’Feir wasn’t laying there anymore. Where is he at three in the morning? I thought to myself. I got out of the bed and walked to the living room, then looked out of the window. His truck was gone as well. Going back to my room I put on a pair of basketball shorts and another tee, put on my tennis shoes, then stopped before leaving out to write a note saying that I had gone running just in case he got back before I did. Picking up my phone I went out the back door, then on to the sidewalk. Running was not a passion for me, but it kept me calm and focused when I was thinking. If I didn’t stay calm I would end up hurting someone. I made a few blocks, and stopped to see how long I had been running. Ten minutes. Not bad. I ran for about fifteen more minutes then made my way back to Mo’s house. I saw his truck was still gone, so I made my way back to the back door, then let myself in. Mo’Feir was sitting at the table with his head down. He looked up once I closed the door. He didn’t look tired, but he did look thoughtful. He pulled a chair close to him and motioned for me to sit down.
“But I have to shower,” I whispered. He nodded and got up.
“Cut off the lamp off beside you, baby,” he said in a low tone, and he sounded so sexy. I did as told, then made my way to the hallway. Before I made it there I felt his hands around my waist, then moving up to my stomach. He pulled me back so I could be as close as possible to him, then began stepping forward, turning into his bedroom.
“The twins are gone to some friends house for the night. They left around eleven to go to a party.”
“That explains the truck being gone,” I said lightly. “What are you doing still up?”
“Wondering why I can’t sleep, that’s what,” he said as we neared his bed. I moved away from him.
“I’m going to hit the shower,” I said going across the hall and to my bedroom. He followed close behind me.
“Can we talk when you get out?” he asked with that same thoughtful look. It almost looked as if something was troubling him.
“Definitely. You don’t have to work tomorrow do you?”
“In the evening,” he said sitting down on the bed. “Proceed.”“Wont be long.” I walked to my bathroom and closed the door. I didn’t have to worry about getting dressed in my room because I kept a pair of sleeping clothes in the bathroom closet just in case I couldn’t just up and get dressed in there. My shower was cool and calming, and I could feel sleep creeping up on me. When I got out of the shower I put on a pair of shorts and a sports bra I had in the closet then stepped back in my room. He was laid out on the bed, and I laid next to him.
“We can talk now,” I said looking up at the ceiling. Something was telling me that this was going to be an interesting conversation.

Ch. 3- Decisions- Mo'Feir

I woke up the next morning at a few minutes before six. I got up and went in my bathroom to start my shower, then walked to the sink to brush my teeth. Morning routine. I was used to it. Once I hit the shower I was wide awake, ready to head out to work. Not a lot of people knew exactly where I worked, and I didn’t tell anyone. Some didn’t even know that I was enrolled in college as well. I got out of the shower and wrapped my towel around my waist, then walked on out to my bedroom and to my closet. Taking out a casual pair of gray slacks, I looked for a shirt and vest to match them. As I pulled out a charcoal gray vest with white detailing and put it on the bed, there was a knock on my bedroom door.
“Yeah,” I yelled not bothering to answer the door, putting on an undershirt instead.
“Mo, it’s me,” I heard Keegan say softly through the door.
“Okay,” I said, “I’m getting dressed. Be out in just a second.”
“Right, alright,” she said, and with that there was nothing more. I finished getting dressed then went to brush my hair. I looked good to me, sexy if you ask me. Conceited, no. Confident, absolutely. I opened my bedroom door and walked over to the room Keegan had slept in. She was looking at a painting on the wall…one that my sister had done some months beforehand. I walked up behind her and placed my arms around her shoulders.
“You wanted me?” I asked, whispering in her ear. She stepped forward and turned to face me.
“Yeah,” she said looking into my eyes, then checking out what I had on.
“Whatsup?” I asked, consciously licking my lips as she stared me down.
“I just wanted to tell you that I thought about it and I have decided to go ahead and give it a try,” she said, obviously trying not to smile.
I looked at her for a few seconds, staring her down. She had on this cute little tee that said ‘I like the way he looks at me’ in big brown letters, then a pair of basketball shorts that were black. She had her hair pulled down and draping her shoulders. While I looked at her I let her words register, and she looked as if she was nervous after a good thirty seconds of me eyeing her down. I stepped forward and she stepped back, not able to go too far because the wall was right behind her. I put my hands around her waist and pulled her closer to me.
“I’m glad you made that decision,” I said.

Mo'Feir (ch. 2....still)

I was sitting there as Keegan watched the movie, but I wasn’t thinking about that. I was trying to figure everything out. How was I going to tell her what I wanted to tell her? I was almost nervous, but I wasn’t. Mo’Feir Ahmad Dwel never gets nervous, I thought to myself. Without saying a word, I slowly pulled Keegan toward me by the waist. She was light, and I moved her as if she were fragile. In my mind, she was. She kicked off her shoes and before I knew it we were snuggled up in the corner of the couch, half watching the movie. At least, I was half watching it. She was so warm against me, and I had my arms around her waist, with my hands resting on her stomach.
“You know, I haven’t felt for you this much ever, until sometime last week,” I whispered lightly in her ear. It was true, too. Sometime the week before we had been talking on the phone, and when we hung up I just could not stop thinking about her. It was getting obvious to me that what I was feeling was going way past friendship…far beyond. She didn’t respond to what I said, but I did feel her tense up a little.
“Key-” I said right when she cut me off.
“I feel what you’re saying, Mo. I just wouldn’t know what to think of a relationship with you,” she said in a low whisper.
“We don’t have to get in a relationship immediately, but we can talk things through and see how it goes,” I said, waiting patiently for her reply.
“Well, can we talk about this later, when we get back to your place?” Keegan asked me, looking over at her father.
“Yeah,” I said, pulling her just a little closer to me and resting my head near her neck. While watching the movie, thoughts were running through my head. I knew that she hadn’t been in a real relationship before to my knowledge, and I didn’t want to hurt her in any way. She was close to my heart, and it wasn’t just because I was beginning to like her in this manner, but it was because I had known her for so long and she was my friend before anything, and I would give anything to go beyond friendship with Keegan.
*****
About fifteen minutes before the movie ended, Keegan’s father woke up. We were all in the movie so we didn’t know that he was awake until he stood up and walked to the kitchen. He came back into the living room with a bottle of water and finished the movie with us. When the movie went off, he cut off the television and Keegan cut on the lights.
“That was a pretty good movie,” he said as if he were awake the entire time.
“Yeah, I know. Especially towards the middle of it,” Keegan said in a sarcastic manner. I smiled and her dad nodded his head.
“Yes, that was a good part of the movie,” he said smiling at her. “What are you two going to get into now?”
Keegan looked over at me and I looked down at my watch. It was nearly eleven. I didn’t have anything planned, but I did have to get back to house to check up with Ca’Reighn and Carthez.
“You ready to leave?” I asked Keegan.
“Sure,” she said while putting her shoes on. “It doesn’t matter to me.”“Alright, then,” I said standing up. “It was really nice meeting you, Mr….I mean Spencer.”
He gave me a firm handshake and a smile. “I enjoyed your company. The two of you should come by sometime later on this week, if you would like.”
“Definitely,” I said smiling and looking back at Keegan as she stood up. “I wouldn’t mind that at all.”
“Neither would I,” Keegan said. “Alright, well, I guess we will be going now.”“Alright, baby,” her father said giving her a hug as we headed to the door.
“You two be safe,” he said, giving me a pat on the back as we headed to my truck.
“Alright goodnight, daddy,” Keegan said back to him.
“Goodnight,” he said and went back inside. I passed her my keys and got in on the passenger side.
“Your dad is a pretty cool guy,” I said to her as she started up the truck. She didn’t say anything, but she just smiled at me.
“You think he liked me?” I asked her, trying not to smile. There was a moment of silence and then we both just started laughing.
“Don’t trip,” she said after the laughing died down, “You obviously gave him a good first impression because he didn’t so much as give you a mean look.”
“Right, right. You know I try,” I said looking out of the window. The sky was clear and the stars were bright, and it had been a while since I had seen that. Seeing the stars like that always touched me some way, and I never told anyone about it, it was just something that caught me off guard.
“What are you thinking of?” Keegan asked me about three minutes into my thoughts.
“Everything.” I looked at her as she drove, then added, “You know, you never answered my question when we were in my room earlier.”
She looked at me confused and sexy as hell, and I couldn’t help but smile at her.
“What question?”
“When I got out of the shower and you were looking at me…and I said that anyone who looks at me like that has to want it. Do you?” I said, smile fading. She didn’t really look uncomfortable, she even smiled.
“I don’t know,” she said glancing my way. At that, I just looked at her.
“Should I give you a reason to?” I asked playfully.
“Definitely,” she said, and she got my hopes up, just before she said, “Not.”
“Keegan, those were my emotions,” I said pretending to be hurt, “and you just stepped on them.”“You’ll be alright,” Keegan said to me. “Let’s talk real talk though.”
Shocked the hell out of me, that statement did.
“Like what?” I asked pretending I had no idea of what she was talking about.
“You already know, and you want to talk real talk, so start off the talking real,” Keegan said, turning in my neighborhood.
“When we get in the house,” I said looking forward. I was surprised she remembered exactly where I stayed. She had only come there the previous day, and I guess it wasn’t hard to learn for her…I liked that. This woman knew her way around.
*****
When we walked in the house, Ca’Reighn and Carthez were sitting in the living room watching a movie. Ca’Reighn’s boyfriend, Jason, was sitting beside her on the couch, and Carthez was sitting on the chair to the right of them. They were watching one of those low budget hood movies that I kept in my DVD collection.
“Hey what’s up?” I said sticking my head in the door.
“Hey,” Carthez and Ca’Reighn said in unison and Jason said, “What’s good?”
“Everything for now. Remember, by one thirty you already know the deal,” I reminded Jason. He didn’t come on to my sister too strong, and they didn’t get away with much, so she didn’t try. We had already discussed that. Keegan stepped past me and into the living room.
“Hey, guys,” she said smiling. Sexy, always sexy. Jason looked up kind of surprised, and Keegan gasped.
“Jason? What’s up?” she said.
“Nothing, girl, what are you doing here?”
Carthez was looking crazy, and Ca’Reighn had that same look. Twins. Nothing like them.
“Cousins,” Keegan explained to the twins and that confused look was replaced.
“Oh,” Ca’Reighn said. “I thought y’all probably went to school or something together. Anywho, how do you do?”
“Good, good,” Keegan said and walked over to whisper something in her ear. Ca’Reighn laughed and so did she. She then gave Jason a hug and walked back to where I stood. Ca’Reighn was looking at me smiling, and Carthez spoke up.
“It is not polite to whisper things,” he said loudly.
“It’s not polite to talk during movies,” Keegan said, and with that she left the room. I said goodnight and walked behind her.
“My room or yours?” I asked walking close enough behind her to hold her if I wanted to. I then stopped between the two bedrooms.
“Yours,” she said and I grabbed her hand, pulling her into my bedroom. Closing the door, I placed my hand on her cheek, just enough to actually feel the warmth of her skin, and closed the space between us. She didn’t move. I moved in as if to kiss her, came close enough to her lips to call it a kiss, and stepped back, smiling.
“Let me stop playing around. You want real talk, so here it is,” I said sitting down on the floor. She sat across from me and leaned forward just a little. She was looking older than she appeared to look a few weeks earlier. She was still holding that girlish look, but maybe that had been my way of seeing her. Here she was looking like a woman, and she didn’t even know it.
“I know that you haven’t been in a relationship before, and I promise you that I haven’t had these types of feelings for you until about a week or two ago. Since then, I think I actually realized how I feel,” I said and paused for a second, then I added, “and that I would want to take this beyond friendship.
I know that you will have to think about this, and that you probably don’t want to get into a relationship just yet, but all I want is for you to consider it. I haven’t been in a relationship in…about three years now, but I know this feeling, and it is definitely no joke,” I said without even looking up. I was looking at my hands the entire time, sort of afraid of how she was taking this.
“Well,” Keegan said, and I looked up at her. “I don’t know what to say to that, but I can’t say that I didn’t see it coming. I’ll think about it.”
“I can settle with that,” I said. “You tired?”
“A little, I think I’ll go get ready to get in the bed,” she answered standing up. I stood up as she headed out the door, and walked out long enough to see her go in her room and close the door. Everything said in less than five minutes I thought to myself. Better than I thought. I looked at the clock and it was nearly half past midnight. I had to get to work the next morning so I got ready to get some sleep in.

Keegan (ch. 2, still)

I sat there on the computer for a while, mainly checking emails and things like that, until Mo’Feir came out of the bathroom. I turned and looked at him and tried not to look too surprised. He was standing there with a towel wrapped around his waist, and he had another towel that he was wiping his head with. His eyes were closed, and I enjoyed looking at him for the next five seconds. When I figured he was going to open his eyes, I turned and looked back at the monitor.
“Hmph,” I heard him say lowly from behind me. “I felt that.”
I looked back at him and smiled thinking, damn, he is sexy, huh?
“What, I can’t look at you now?” I asked playfully. Oh damn, it sounds like I’m flirting with him.
“Nope, the only people who can stare at me like that in this form have to want it,” he said, then looked surprised. “I mean, well, you know what I mean.”
“No, I don’t,” I said signing out of my email account and standing up. “Explain.”
“What I meant was, well, you don’t want this,” he said looking down at his own body, then eying me curiously. “Do you?”
“Whatever, Mo,” I said getting up to leave the room. “Get dressed.”
“I thought you wanted to watch,” he said as I headed out his bedroom door.
“Nope,” I said turning to get one last look at him in that state. “See ya in a minute.”
I walked across to my room and walked to my bathroom. “He is something else,” I said aloud to myself, as I ran myself some bathwater and went back to take a seat on my bed. Taking out my cell phone, I called my father.
“Hello, Key,” he answered after the second ring. I smiled.
“Hey dad, how’s it going?” I asked.
“Alright, darling, what are you into?” he asked. I could hear the smile in his voice.
I sighed then told him the whole story about how I left home. He didn’t say too much, he just listened and waited for me to finish. When I was done, he spoke.
“Well, I would rather you stay with me for the next few weeks, but I don’t mind what you do. I understand that I was not available when all of this happened, but know that you can come stay with me until you go to stay with your friend’s relative…I’m just glad that you are safe.”
“Thanks, dad,” I said. “So, what are you doing tonight?”“Nothing that I know of,” he answered. “Why?”
“I wanted to come over there, and I wanted you to meet Mo’Feir. You don’t mind do you?” I asked him.
“No,” he said. I stood up and ran to turn off my bath water.
“Alright, well, we’ll be there in about an hour,” I said.
“Okay, darling,” he said letting out a laugh.
“I love you.”“I love you too, Keegan,” he answered before I hung up the phone. I placed my phone back on my bed and got ready for my bath.
*****
We were pulling up in my father’s driveway, Mo’Feir had let me drive, and he was just looking at me as I put the car in park.
“What?” I said looking over at him after putting his keys in my pocket.
“Nothing.”“Ready to meet my dad?” I asked him while noticing the look in his eyes. He wanted to say something, and before the night was over I was going to make him tell me.
“Yeah,” he said looking away for a second, then eying me again. “You ready for me to meet him?”
“Yeah, actually,” I answered before I added, “What is it that you want to say to me?”
He looked at me strangely. “Say what?”“You want to tell me something, and I can tell by how you’re looking at me, so what is it?”He didn’t answer me for a moment, he just sat back in his seat. Finally, he sat up.
“Look, I can’t exactly tell you right now, but I will,” he said looking at me, then licking his lips. I know I’m not thinking he is sexy, I was thinking to myself.
“Alright,” I said. “I have something to tell you too, later.”
“Aight, let’s go inside now,” he said getting out of the truck. He ran over to my door and opened mine before I could reach for the handle.
“Race you to the door,” I said running in front of him.
“Wait,” he said taking off running behind me. I ran up the front steps and made it to the door just seconds before he did and knocked.
“Cheater,” he said and I laughed just before my dad opened the door.
“Key,” he said loudly pulling me in for a hug.
“Hey daddy,” I said without letting him go for a while. It had been nearly five months since I had seen him, and that was only because I ran into him at the grocery store. I let him go and straightened my shirt.
“Daddy, this is Mo’Feir,” I said. “Mo’Feir, this is my dad.”
“Hello, Mr. Sheers. It’s nice to meet you,” Mo’Feir said holding out his hand.
“Pleasure’s mine, son,” my dad said shaking his hand firmly. “Call me Spencer.” I smiled while looking at Mo. He was looking really good tonight to impress my father, but he didn’t have to do much to do so. Olive green button down Sean Jean shirt, a green and brown blazer, a pair of Sean Jean jeans with the olive green fade in the middle, and a pair of green and brown Adidas to top it off. He was smelling good too, not like cologne or anything, but like Dove soap and cocoa butter. My father led us to the living room and we sat down.
“I was thinking that we could play a few games while making a little conversation if you don’t care to do so,” my father stated as he got comfortable in his chair.
“Yeah, that would be nice. What games do you have?” Mo’Feir asked him.
“He has everything,” I said before dad could say anything. “Monopoly, Scrabble, Uno, Checkers, guessing games and all of that…”“I feel like playing scrabble, if I say so myself,” Mo said. My dad looked at him for a few seconds, then smiled.
“Now that’s what I’m talking about. Let me go get it,” he said. I got up before he did.
“I got it, dad,” I said allowing him to sit back down. “Where is it?”
“In the closet at the end of the hall,” he said pointing left, but I knew where he meant. I left out of the living room, walked through the kitchen and down the hall where the bathroom and two of the bedrooms were. Stopping for a second, I went in the bedroom that I called mine whenever I had visited my dad. It looked lonely, and the few things that I had in there didn’t make up for the look that nobody was ever present in the room. The bed was neatly made, and the closet was slightly opened. I could see from where I was that it was empty. Placing a hand on my dresser, I took a moment longer to just look around. I called it home even though I didn’t get to actually live there. Taking a step back, I went back into the hall and down to the end where the closet was and opened the door. I found the game and headed back to the living room. The two of them were deep in conversation when I walked in.
“Took you long enough,” my dad said as I put the board on the table and took out the bag of letters.
“Whatever,” I replied with a smile. “Would have taken you longer, though.”
We all laughed and he came back at me.
“Just because I have you by twenty years doesn’t mean I can’t move faster than you, darling. In fact, I could guarantee I can STILL beat you racing on foot any day.”I thought back to the days when I ran track, and he would run with me. We would often stop and race and he would beat me nearly every time. That was a during the beginning stages of my mother’s alcoholism.
“Maybe,” I admitted. “We’ll see later.”
“What about you, son? You run?” he asked Mo’Feir. Mo nodded a little before he answered.
“Yeah, I ran track all through high school, played football, basketball, baseball my sophomore year, and soccer my freshman year.”
“Well, you sound like Keegan,” my dad said. I blushed and looked at Mo. He was looking at me like there was something I wasn’t telling him.
“What? I played basketball, softball, soccer, and ran track. That’s all,” I said. “I quit my junior year.”
“Yeah, that was when her mother was having a few problems,” my dad explained before asking, “So, who will keep the score?”
“I will,” Mo’Feir said getting a pen out of his pocket. I took the notebook that dad kept in the box and handed it to Mo.
“Alright, pick a letter,” dad said and we all reached into the bag of letters.
*****
We had been playing scrabble for nearly two hours when we all decided to put in a movie. It was supposed to be a horror film, but I doubted it. I got up to pop some popcorn, while my dad came in to get a few sodas.
“You have a good taste in friends,” my father whispered as he walked past me to the refrigerator. He looked back at me and smiled after he spoke. “He knows some things.”“Yeah,” I said speaking low. He grabbed a few sodas and came over to give me a quick hug before heading back to the living room. Mo’Feir came in shortly afterward as I was putting the popcorn in two bowls. He didn’t really say anything, just stood behind me and watched. He was so close to me that I could feel the heat from his body. After a moment of silence he spoke up.
“You’ll let me hold you while we watch the movie?” I closed my eyes and thought for a second. Maybe we should try it, but…oh what the hell.
“Yeah,” I said while nodding my head. “No problem.”
He closed the rest of the space between my body and his and whispered in my ear.
“When we get home, we have some things to talk about.” After he said those words he took my earlobe in his mouth slowly, earring and all, for a second before letting go, then walked out of the kitchen. I took a deep breath and picked up the two bowls of popcorn, then carried them into the living room. My heart was racing, but I kept my cool.
“Here you go, daddy,” I said, handing my father a bowl as he got comfortable in his recliner. I knew he was going to be sleep by the time ten minutes of the movie had gone by, mainly because it probably wouldn’t even be good.
“Thank you, Key,” he said. “I put your drinks over on that table beside your couch.”“Okay,” I said sitting on the couch next to Mo’Feir. He gave me a quick glance and then focused more on the television as my father pressed play. For the first fifteen minutes all three of us were watching the film. It was an okay movie, I would give it three stars, but I couldn’t stay completely focused. I looked over at my father, whose head was tilted back, and he was sleeping. He snored, but not very loudly. It was barely audible over the movie.
“Damn, he’s sleep?” Mo’ asked looking at him.
“Yeah. He probably had a hard day at work,” I said more to myself than to Mo’Feir. “Just watch the movie.”

Mo'Feir (ch. 2 cont'd)

“Where does he stay? I don’t mind,” I answered looking over at Keegan.
“Thanks,” she said. She looked so down, I just wanted to get her mind off of everything that was going on.
“What’s he like?” I asked her. She looked confused for a second.
“What?”
“Your dad, what is he like?” I asked. This reminded me of the time she asked me about my mother.
“Oh,” she said giving a warm smile. “He’s like my best friend. Before the divorce, which was years ago, we all were happy, and I was closest to him than anyone. I mean. after everything else happened she wouldn’t let me see him, but he always found a way to visit me without momma knowing. Right now he’s a teacher at my old high school. He never told momma that.”
She stopped and laughed, and I let her continue.
“Most of the time when I stayed after school, I was talking to him. Everyone knew he was my dad, but momma didn’t know he was working there, if she did I would have been transferred probably.”
“Whoa, for real?” I said looking over at her while I parked at the gym. “That’s crazy.”
“Yeah, I love him a lot though. He’s pretty much my best friend. He taught me a lot of stuff,” she said and sighed. “Well, enough of that.”
I watched her as she got out of the truck, and I cut off the ignition and got out as well.
“Slow down, Key,” I said walking up behind her.
“Speed up, Mo,” she said looking back at me smiling.
“Sexy ass,” I said lowly to myself. She turned and looked at me mysteriously.
“What did you just say?” she asked.
“Nothing, I was talking to myself,” I said, knowing she didn’t hear me.
“Yeah, right. You gon tell me,” she said pulling me through the door. “Tell me.”
“I didn’t say nothing, woman,” I said laughing. She let me go and I headed to the locker room to put on my gym wear. When I came out I saw her over by the treadmills. I got on the one next to her. We both were running in silence for a moment.
“Damn, I left my mp3 player,” she said.
“You can talk to me,” I said, but I was reaching in my pocket for my iPod to give to her.
“Okay,” she said and paused for a second. “Tell me about your mother.”
I stopped running and stepped off of the treadmill, then I handed her my iPod.
“You can listen to some stuff on there,” I said walking toward the weights as if I hadn’t heard her.
“Mo,” she called after me. “Mo’Feir, what’s wrong.”
“Nothing,” I said, getting settled to do some bench pressing.
“You’re lying,” she said stepping off her treadmill and walking over toward me. I sat up once she was in front of me.
“It’s just something I don’t feel like talking about,” I said looking up at her.
“But I told you about-” she started before I cut her off.
“That’s a different story,” I said, and she glared at me. “I told you I will tell you another time, but I can’t today, okay?”
“Whatever, Mo,” she said walking back to her treadmill. I ignored her for once and did a few squats, and while she was doing her own thing, I got up and went out to my truck for a while. I sat there and I listened to some music, trying to figure out how I would explain anything to Keegan when I could not even tell myself. I felt bad, and it was because I could not give her any information without giving it to myself. I just wasn’t ready to accept some things. I turned off the radio and got out of my truck. When I walked back in the gym, she was over near the jump ropes. She stopped and walked over to me
“Look, Mo, sorry if I made you mad or uncomfortable in any way,” she said grabbing my hand.
“Look, you’re good,” I said smiling.
“I’m ready to go,” she said grabbing a towel and wiping off her face and neck.
“Cool, let’s head out then,” I said, and with that we left.
*****
For dinner I cooked some southern food, I didn’t have a taste for any Chinese food or fast food. And since I was in the middle of Georgia, it was only right to cook up some fried chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans, field peas and cornbread. Of course, the twins helped me, and even Keegan did some cooking. She was baking some cookies for us, and I let her drive my truck to go get some ice cream to go with them. I was finishing up frying the chicken and told Carthez to take it out for me.
“Aight,” he said stepping over to finish the job, and I left out of the kitchen and headed up to the living room. The living room was the furthest from the kitchen or any other room in the house. Sitting down on the couch, I laid my head back and closed my eyes. Just then I had this intense feeling run through my entire body. It lasted about five seconds, and it felt like an adrenaline rush. My heart was beating fast, I began sweating, my mouth went dry, and for a second my vision was blurred. I remembered the last time that happened. The last time that happened…
I stood to my feet instantly and ran back into the kitchen, just as Keegan walked in with the grocery bag. They all turned to look at me.
“You alright?” Ca’Reighn asked, looking a little concerned, but keeping that smile of hers. I nodded and went to the sink to wash my hands. I looked down at them and they were shaking.
“What kind of ice cream did you get?” I asked turning to face Keegan as she put it in the freezer. My hands were behind me resting on the counter.
“Homemade vanilla,” she said and I smiled a little. I dried my hands and looked at all of them.
“Alright, let’s eat.”
*****
After dinner I went back to my room get cleaned up. There was a knock on my door just as I headed to the shower.
“Come in,” I said stopping where I was. Keegan stepped in my room. We had already talked about going to see her father. I didn’t want to go over there smelling like chicken grease either.
“You mind if I use your computer?” she asked.
“Nah, not at all,” I responded, going over to the desk and cutting it on.
“Thanks,” she said stepping closer to me and kissing me on the cheek. “Take a shower, you smell like the chicken.”
I laughed at her, walking back to my bathroom and shutting the door. I placed my forehead against it and held it there for a moment, knowing I would have a problem if she stayed too long. My heart quickened its pace, and I had to calm down. She was getting to me, I don’t know what it was, but she was getting to me. Never did I think that I would like her like this, but I guess I should have never said never. I cut on the water and took off my T-shirt and gym shorts and stepped in the shower.